I feel somewhat conflicted about the topic of appearance. Since I am against the hyperfocus on a woman’s appearance and the negative affects on women’s body image, I am generally turned off by women’s fashion magazines. I haven’t been into using a lot of make-up since high school, having become more of a make-up minimalist in my adult years. However, I also have noticed that after gaining weight, I lost all joy in my appearance. I started wearing frumpier clothes and never putting on more than blush to brighten up my face. So while I don’t think too much focus on appearance is healthy, I also think that my nearly total disregard for appearance was a sign of my negative attitude towards myself. I no longer felt that I was able to be attractive or that I was worthy of attention. At one point, I found myself at a friend’s Mary Kay party which is the sort of thing I would normally avoid at all costs. However, it turned out to be just what I needed at the time. Through faking being into make-up for my friend’s benefit, I rediscovered that a little primping can go a long way. I felt prettier and realized that just a little bit of extra attention to myself gave me a little lift. It was a reminder that I had started acting as if I didn’t matter. I now like to have a little face powder, mascara and eye shadow on hand for occasions when I want to be get a little dressed up. Flattering clothes, haircut and make-up really can be a boost to your self-esteem and mood. As with everything in life, it is about balance. Too much focus on appearance isn’t good, but neither is too little focus.

Read more